Advice from a reformed cheater


Oh my goodness cheating, it’s a very heart wrenching topic and a lot of couples go through it every single day because a woman or man somewhere in the world finds out that their partner/spouse is cheating on them believe me it is not a wonderful feeling.

As a reformed cheater I was cheated on by the man I cheated on my partner with yes karma is a bitch right. Now this was my first time someone ever cheated on well that I know of. I was angry, you know I kept asking him you know how much I fought to be with you and what I gave up for our love let me tell you something when you partner cheats all that does not matter how you got to be because their burning lust and passion for the new toy it’s all they think about and your crying, whining, screaming and tantrums they fall on deaf ears.

In this relationship with let’s call him A it turned me into that woman who see in the movies who is very obsessive about what their man is doing when they are not with them yep I became her. I would wait for him to fall asleep so that I can take his phone and see if he spoke to her today and if there was evidence of the conversation I would wake him up and start a fight right there and then it did not matter that it was 1am.

So let’s get into what made me to cheat with A in the first place, well, I felt unappreciated, unnoticed, Mr C was always working rarely home and never took me out to restaurants, even when I begged he lets out and eat out maybe see a movie he was not interested so I got bored. A persuade me and I told him I was married and all. He didn’t care he loved me, he noticed, made me feel special and he would write me messages throughout the day telling me how beautiful I am and how he drove passed my work just to see me.He was this wonderful man and he knew what to say and you know what I finally gave in to the feeling of being desired and spoiled. A was a very attentive man he would notice little things like when I have new nail polish, new hair style etc., every woman wants a man like that so Mr C suspected that something was up with me. So one day while consumed by my love for A I came clean to Mr C and I told him I was leaving and I left I didn’t not want to hear anything I didn’t care that Mr C promised to be better and change I walked out.

Now that I left Mr C I didn’t have to sneak around anymore to be with A we were together, inseparable things were really good and I thought I found love. Until I found out that he was now sneaking around on me with an ex girlfriend.

This is advice from a reformed cheater the grass is not always greener on the other side and its usually just infatuation because you feel neglected by your partner. Cheating is never the best solution because it mostly happens when you are at your lowest and feeling unloved. Feeling unloved is never a good reason to cheat because at the end you will be the fool who left something not so broken, for something that looked like gold but it was really just a tin. If you are not happy, just walk away and avoid the drama that is so time consuming.

My Random Musings
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A South African bloggers that enjoys sharing her experiences whether about a product or good/bad customer service. I started Ferocious Haven at the end of 2014 , now Life and Mo. I write about beauty products, product reviews , parenting journey and challenges and life and achieving personal finance.


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